Overshadowed by Grace

‘…the power of the Most High will overshadow you… For nothing will be impossible with God.’ 
— from Luke1:34-37 (one of my Christmas/Advent readings)

After having my first baby, there came a season of  mental “re-training” — I had to realize that it wasn’t going to be so hard anymore to do things.  My body and brain started coming back, and I had to relearn how to use them in a non-pregnant way.  Anyone hear me on this?

With my first post-partum, I had no idea this issue even existed.  I just did not remember anymore what it felt like to be interested in cleaning, or maintaining some chore. I didn’t know it could be easy anymore to flirt with my husband.  There was no hope for our front porch or any other area which I had signed up to take care of in our married life.

Granted, that is not everyone’s pregnancy story (I don’t want to scare people away from having kids).  Nevertheless I think Snow White’s brain made a much faster return-to-normalcy after her coma than mine did.

It cracks me up: there were moments upon moments of “Aha!  It only took me five minutes to _________, and I’m not exhausted!”   Make some tea, put dishes away, clean an area, play with my child, whatever.  You name it.

So, the second-pregnancy-around, I came prepared.  (I thought.)  I talked myself through decisions to stop caring about my shaved legs by saying: “In a few months, I will do that again, but for now I won’t worry about it.”  I knew that I would return from the ride and eventually be myself again.

Uh…. yeah….. I forgot that this time I would have: “Two!  Two precious angels!  Ah – Ah – Ah!”  (Please tell me you get that reference.)  It’s not that I’m complaining.  I actually, if anything, would complain that I can’t seem to get over the change to two toddler/babies and keep smacking my head like a moron into the wall of “what I WANT to do.”  Again, anyone hear me on this?  I know I’m not alone or stupid in this, but dang.

So… here we are…. seven months in and I am finally getting some progress on my mental switch.  Anyway…. here’s to learning to taking it EVEN EASIER on myself and accepting the new normal.  My Father-God seems to know just how to embrace me in it, too.  I have to work a little at listening to His Voice instead of the inner-critical one that likes to play on me.

So… Proud-a-me?  Yes.

Is progress really that important?  Not always, no, not really.

Is it perfect?  Definitely not!

Is it still good?  Hell-to-the-yeah.

So, thanks, Lord, for helping through this next reprocessing/readjusting phase.  Thanks for helping me figure out the new normal.  And thanks for friends and family (and an amazing husband) who help and encourage along the way.  Help me to rest fully in Your overshadowing grace and love and excitement about my life!

Thanks for reading, Friends.

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2 thoughts on “Overshadowed by Grace

  1. After reading this post, I realize just how post partemed I was at the time. My brain went to sleep, so to speak, and I walked around not fully revved. I felt in idle most of the time after my first baby and my third baby. Analogies are not my strong point, but in my older age I feel some days like the tank is almost on empty and needs to be refueled in order to take interest in cooking and cleaning and chores. It never occurred to me at the time I had children that I was suffering from a post partem blues. You are right about everything you posted, Dot. So glad you are posting pioneerprincess and sharing it with me.

    • Freddie, bless your heart. 😦 You know, I was just reading the other day about the difference between important and urgent, and how our “tanks being refueled” is important even if something else is urgent (like changing the diaper on the baby). So I am having to try and do things that refuel ME — like bake or do some craft or write, so that I feel refueled so that I can handle the oncoming urgencies……. but it really helps me to know I’m not alone in this too. I am enjoying finding community on this. XOX my friend and sister in Christ.

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